Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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