dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
When are your genitals available?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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