Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
