you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
