So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
