Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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