butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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