so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
