okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
