all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
