i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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