I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You left your underwear on the fireplace
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
