don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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