Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
