Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
