Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
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I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
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I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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