how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
