She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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