id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
God I need to hump something, right now.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize