had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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