Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
