The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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