Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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