So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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