Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
