I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize