New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
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