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oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
