So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
