In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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