whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Define "chronic" masturbator.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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