I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
