Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
OPIZZABONMYDICK
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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