how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
