i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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