Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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