I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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