it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize