Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
