Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
