I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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