You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize