mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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