Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize