i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
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Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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