In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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