You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize