So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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