Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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