He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
