Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
